Monday, January 3, 2011

A Perfectly Poopy First Day of the New Year! Or. . .Why the Pooper Scooper is One of Man's Greatest Inventions!

Man, the first day of 2011 was really terrific. Few things will make me look to the future with a greater sense of promise than a first day of the year that starts with sun and with that January thaw feel in the air. The day's sweetness called me outside to vacuum the seats and floor of my car, picking up the dirt, dog hair, and dropped bits of kibble that nearly had made the carpet invisible. I was still a bit high from the Orange victory in the Pinstripe Bowl. I mean I felt bad for the saluting kid, but, what are you gonna do? Somebody's got to win, and the Orange aren't giving it back. I used that gridiron high to propel myself around the garage as I swept and shoveled the dirt and bits of paper, leaves and dog hair that had settled on the floor. I admit that the afternoon did bring rain, but we were off to the Dome to watch Boeheim's boys kick Irish butt, a truly beautiful thing to see! Then we went home to a terrific dinner and a relaxing evening.

Still, I have yet to mention another important activity that January 1, 2011, afforded for me and why I included "Perfectly Poopy" in my title. Well, anyone who owns a 95 pound Labrador Retriever knows what awaits them in their yard when the snow melts. A virtual minefield of doggy doo! An elephant graveyard of excrement! So much, in fact, that it is difficult to believe that it all came out of one animal. If, perish the thought, the snow cover lasts from December to late March, then the panorama of poop that spreads out before you and your pooper scooper is mind boggling. That's why a thaw at the beginning of January is so necessary. The first of the year afforded me a chance to remove a month and a half or so worth of poop. It took more than a half hour to pick up, and filled the bottom of a garbage can about 14 or 15 inches deep. It weighed. . .I don't want to guess how much it weighed. But the effort was so worth it because when March rolls around I'll have that much less (fill in the parentheses with your favorite term) to deal with.